I saw one of the standard Mother’s Day paeans in a newsletter the other day and was reminded how often the mushy sentiments in such articles leave a bit to be desired relative to reality. The newsletter version featured old standbys such as:

My mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE … “What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don’t talk back to me!”

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION … “Just wait until your father gets home.”

My mother taught me LOGIC … “If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

My mother taught me ESP … “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I don’t know when you’re cold?”

My mother taught me HUMOR … “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

But I think that some more realistic teachings can be extolled. Thus I give you …

My mother taught me THERE IS ALWAYS ROOM FOR ONE MORE … “Just pull up a chair, you’re always welcome to eat with us.”

My mother taught me THERE IS NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT … “If you don’t hoe the weeds now, they’ll go to seed. Then you have a real problem.”

My mother taught me IT IS BETTER TO GIVE, BUT LEARN TO RECEIVE WITH GRACE AS WELL … “You’ve helped us so many times, let us help you now.”

My mother taught me ABOUT PERSONAL HYGIENE … “Wash under your arms! Someday you will want to lift your arms in public.”

My mother taught me YOU NEED NOT DISCLOSE ALL THAT YOU KNOW … “Yes I knew you and your brother broke the door. But you already felt bad enough about it so I didn’t need to bring it up.” And you’d be amazed at all the secrets that weren’t actually a secret when you talk to your mother about those events years after the fact. {*grin*}

My mother taught me TO LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY … “People can’t help how they look, but they can change their heart. So love the heart and tolerate the rest.”

In honor of mothers (and mother-in-laws) everywhere, may you all enjoy a