All posts by djones

mayor

Out and Gone

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This morning after introducing the Governor for his Town Hall meeting, I sat silently in the audience and let everyone else try to make a political statement. (There are seldom actual straight questions at such a meeting, just a lot of people trying to get their view out there. Generally in the manner of the old “Have you stopped beating your wife yet?” type questions. There were finally a couple of good questions from the high school government classes in attendance.) The new mayor and I sat side by side exchanging sarcastic comments about many of the evasive answers from the Governor. You could sure tell the Governor was an attorney!

As we walked out of the auditorium, groups of people came up to congratulate me, checking to see if I was overjoyed to be free at last, then offering condolences to the new mayor. Larry (the new mayor) and I thought it was hilarious.

Tonight I opened the city council meeting as normal, then led the council through accepting Larry’s resignation (so he could take office as mayor) and then turned it over to the judge to swear in the new council so they could be seated (during which time we outgoing dinosaurs repaired to the gallery to watch). The first act of business was to call me back up to get my plaque and chamber name tag from Larry. So this is what I got for serving the maximum three terms as mayor (sort of like a repeat offender sentence):

All in all not a bad haul.

It was  interesting to watch Larry discover the difference between attending a meeting as a council member and running the meeting as mayor. I think he’ll soon settle in and do a great job. Here’s wishing him and the new council a successful future!

Now I have to edit the sidebar spiel and I can return to my normal sarcastic self just in time for Thanksgiving. {*grin*}

monday, office

Short Week Monday

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The air carried a definite tang of cold and the clouds in the distance were looking a lot like snow all day. It was the perfect day to complete my Thanksgiving shopping, and the store was packed with others in a similar mind. Thanksgiving looks to be a small crowd here, consisting of Mom, MIL, L, Uncle J and Aunt J, possibly cousin D and me sitting down to pick the carcass of the bird. (Which is currently residing in the refrigerator waiting for a nice warm up on Thursday morning.) Looks like L will be getting into town on Wednesday, so a lot of the cleaning and prepping has been left in my dubious hands. The Son has to work in the mountains over the holiday, so he won’t be here. Maybe we’ll save him a drumstick or two since he really likes them.

Preparatory to making the official announcement about running for a partisan office as first mentioned here, I spent part of the afternoon filing the necessary pieces of paper with the county and the state. Come December I hope to have my finance committee up and running along with all the other things needed to be a real candidate. Now all I have to do is write the press release announcing my candidacy for early December release. Then it is a matter of getting people organized and …

As regular readers know, tomorrow will be my last day as mayor. After three terms, it is going to be different to be able to blame someone else. {*grin*} But before I depart, there are still a couple of last acts. In the morning, the Governor and his Town Hall Meeting will be in the area and I get to do the honors of introducing him. That will be my next to last official act as mayor. (The incoming mayor and I flipped a coin to see who would do the honors since he will be sworn in and me out as mayor in the evening city council meeting. Given that the governor is a {*gasp*} Democrat out here in a rural Republican area, I leave it up to you to guess whether I won or lost the coin toss to introduce him.) My last duty will be to convene the city council meeting tomorrow night so that the new members can be sworn in and assume the meeting. I’m still waiting to see what the surprise I have been threatened with is going to be.

Time to get back to reality. Besides, I may have to rewrite my sidebar after tomorrow night.

beer, glossophobia, sunday

Glossophobia and Beer

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In lieu of watching the Broncos lose yet again, I did the crossword puzzle. What to my wondering eyes should appear but the clue “Overcome glossophobia.” The appearance of that particular word made my day.

Why? I can’t tell you the number of people who have stated to me that they suffer from glossophobia. Usually in a meandering manner because they don’t know that what they suffer is called glossophobia. And usually directly after I have evinced an utter lack of the affliction. Have you caught on to what glossophobia means yet? Here’s the definition from Wikipedia: glossophobia. Clearer now?

Now that you know what it means, you have probably figured out that the answer to “Overcome glossophobia.” is orate. I.e. if you have a fear of public speaking, the cure is to speak in public.

I suffered from glossophobia in my teens and twenties. Speaking in public had some aspects of pulling teeth without anesthetic. Not pleasant at all. But then somewhere along the path of life, I realized that most people dread public speaking and are just so happy it is you standing up there in front that you could recite the alphabet and they would applaud. That recognition coupled with the realization that I have already embarrassed myself in almost every way possible and survived leads to a complete lack of fear of blithering in public.

I’ll leave you with a section from this post of long ago.

  • You have lost all fear of public speaking, no matter how small, large, friendly, or angry the audience. (You figure that by now you have already embarrassed yourself in every way possible. The challenge now is finding creative new ways of attaining embarrassment. After the time you drunkenly recited the Beer Prayer, nude, from the second story balcony, to an audience of thousands, everything else is simply anti-climatic.)

For those who don’t know the Beer Prayer:

The Beer Prayer

Our lager,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink.
Thy will be drunk,
At home as it is in the tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillage,
As we forgive those who spill against us.
And lead us not to incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers.
For thine is the beer, the bitter, and the lager.
Barmen.



(This version from Ted Guhl)

P.S. No, I haven’t ever recited the Beer Prayer in the nude from a balcony. Close, but not quite.

food, humor, saturday

Fun and Oddities

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I was visited this afternoon by another member of our Boy Scout committee to do some bookkeeping (I am the treasurer and he is the leader) related to the popcorn sales. Thank heavens the annual popcorn ordeal is about over. Once we completed the business at hand, the conversation began to drift. He and I were both Scouts in the troop some 40+ years ago and his sister was in L and my high school class, so we go back a ways. There is never a shortage of hot air to be exchanged.

The conversation went from hunting (and how neither of us does much of it anymore) to changes in the meat eating patterns of society at large. Sparing you the lean versus fat and wild versus range versus feedlot arguments, we finally landed on meats of our childhood that have become scarce to see in the stores. We both noted that you don’t see the huge displays of cow tongue anymore. (And we both agreed that we neither were big tongue fans.) But then we went on to note that we both love beef liver and onions, but don’t eat it anywhere near as often as we did in our youth. That led naturally to beef heart. He loved it in his youth but seldom finds it on the meat counter now. I am neutral on the topic since I can’t remember eating all that much of it at any time. That in turn led to a whole slew of foods like venison salami and antelope sausage and ….

Which leads me to some questions for you. What cuts of meat from your youth do you no longer find in abundance in the store? And what wild meat concoctions do you remember fondly from your youth?

Now on to the amusement of the day – a story courtesy of the local paper about another Colorado town of similar size to ours about 450 miles from here.

DURANGO (AP) — A person in a chicken costume ruffled the feathers of Durango’s city council as its members discussed rules for backyard fowl.

At a council meeting Tuesday, someone in a chicken costume quietly entered the council chambers just as the mayor was discussing a recently-passed backyard hen ordinance.

The costumed chicken took a few turns, flapped its arms, then took a seat in the nearly empty gallery.

Several minutes later, the big bird left — without identifying itself — after laying an egg on the floor.

Council members told The Durango Herald they were perplexed by the costumed chicken but found the visit humorous. The council voted 3-2 earlier this month to make it easier to keep backyard chickens.

Makes me think I’m leaving the mayor business at the perfect time.

dreams, Friday

Dream Awakening

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Do you ever have dreams that feature something just so wrong that it wakes you ranting out of a sound sleep? I sometimes do. In fact I had a dream like that last night.

It was a very detailed dream in which an elderly German gentleman was trying to convince me to buy and market a fluggenmuffler. What is a fluggenmuffler? In my dream it was a device that that performed some sort of factor of 100 conversion. I.e. if you put 100 lbs. of junk in one end, only one lb. came out the other. If you put 1 lb. in the other end, 100 lbs. came out the original end.  An amazing device that would solve world hunger and pollution in one fell swoop. After all you could put 1 grape in the front and out would come a 100. Sort of like the loaves and fishes in the bible. But you could also put 100 tons of industrial emissions in the other end and have only 1 ton come out the other. The ideal purification device. Just feed the pollution stream through it a few hundred times and your pollution issue is no more.

So what did I wake up ranting about? Well, the device neither heated nor cooled the local environment and drew no power. My poor physicists mind was immediately up in arms about the apparent violations of the laws of thermodynamics. So I woke up ranting that no fluggenmuffler can violate the laws of physics like that. Once I was awake enough to realize it had been a dream, I was busy looking around to make sure no one had heard me ranting in the night. Fortunately Molly slept right through my awakening and ranting. Since only the dog and I were in the house, my rant remained a secret.

Shortly thereafter I fell back to sleep, only to awaken with the same rant from the continuation of the same dream. I can’t tell you how vivid the dream was. I finally fell asleep for the rest of the night, but, in a rarity for me, I could remember the dream in detail when I woke up this morning.

The embarrassing thing is that most people wouldn’t even think of comparing the parameters of a dream to the possibilities of reality. I guess that is what happens to us physicists when our dreams intersect with the laws of the known universe – the known universe always raises a fuss.

So what wakes you ranting at the wrongness of it all?