{"id":14,"date":"2012-01-01T18:31:00","date_gmt":"2012-01-01T18:31:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/?p=14"},"modified":"2012-01-01T18:31:00","modified_gmt":"2012-01-01T18:31:00","slug":"new-years-resolutions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/?p=14","title":{"rendered":"New Years Resolutions"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t normally do resolutions, but this year I have been inspired by the number of blogs featuring\u00c2\u00a0acknowledgements\u00c2\u00a0of the usual course of breaking the resolutions. So forthwith are my resolutions that i can keep for the coming year:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span>I will accuse more people of having the intelligence of a\u00c2\u00a0<\/span><span>kumquat<\/span><span>.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>I will gain weight. <i>(Made even easier by my new insulin regimen.)<\/i><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>I will ask &#8220;And your point is?&#8221; to any number of people pointlessly blithering on.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>I will be accused of speaking pedantically more than once.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span>I will have any number of questions for which I can find no good answer.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I&#8217;ll leave you with this question<\/p>\n<div><a href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-LD6DY7bsFbI\/TwClFiwHXNI\/AAAAAAAABCo\/RF5VrPGfvLE\/s1600\/christmas_vet.jpeg\" imageanchor=\"1\"><img loading=\"lazy\" border=\"0\" height=\"302\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-LD6DY7bsFbI\/TwClFiwHXNI\/AAAAAAAABCo\/RF5VrPGfvLE\/s400\/christmas_vet.jpeg\" width=\"400\"><\/a><\/div>\n<p>and these thoughts<\/p>\n<div><a href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-NR6ZviQPLbE\/TwCliw3HSVI\/AAAAAAAABC0\/xQw_v8_JPh0\/s1600\/image0151515151515.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\"><img loading=\"lazy\" border=\"0\" height=\"262\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-NR6ZviQPLbE\/TwCliw3HSVI\/AAAAAAAABC0\/xQw_v8_JPh0\/s400\/image0151515151515.jpg\" width=\"400\"><\/a><\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div><a href=\"http:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-bTE34O6QfM0\/TwClnpbwKeI\/AAAAAAAABDA\/Qi9PVXoyWRo\/s1600\/get-attachment-4.jpeg\" imageanchor=\"1\"><img loading=\"lazy\" border=\"0\" height=\"266\" src=\"http:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-bTE34O6QfM0\/TwClnpbwKeI\/AAAAAAAABDA\/Qi9PVXoyWRo\/s400\/get-attachment-4.jpeg\" width=\"400\"><\/a><\/div>\n<div><i>(In honor of the pending divorce of Katie Perry and Russell Brand)<\/i><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t normally do resolutions, but this year I have been inspired by the number of blogs featuring\u00c2\u00a0acknowledgements\u00c2\u00a0of the usual course of breaking the resolutions. So forthwith are my resolutions that i can keep for the coming year: I will accuse more people of having the intelligence of a\u00c2\u00a0kumquat. I will gain weight. (Made even &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/?p=14\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">New Years Resolutions<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dljones.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}