All posts by djones

cml, writer's challenge

I Wanna Be …

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Once more it is time for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Challenge. This week the prompts are:

  1. Create a video for your blog (vlog) and participate in Tim’s “vlogemotions” by talking about an emotion you’ve felt this week. You can link up here AND link up at Tim’s place at Fort Thompson on Thursday. That’s right…you have my permission to double dip.
  2. Do you want a baby?
  3. Who got in big trouble this week?
  4. Write a poem for your mother.
  5. Time for a trip? Where are you headed this summer?…Or where would you go if you COULD.

I know for a fact that #1 is not going to happen. By the time I shaved, trimmed my beard, got decently dressed, found a camera, made 6 million attempts to get four consecutive sentences out without an uh, duh or ahem, it would be next week. Besides, many of the phrases from my “You’re So Ugly …” post ring too close to true for me on camera. No point in killing the few readers i have! {*grin*}

As for #2, been there and done that. It is neat to see the Son emerging into responsible adulthood now, but I don’t miss the trials and tribulations of getting from toddler-hood to adulthood enough for the baby to toddler-hood stage that I loved to make up for it. I do miss the wide eyed joy of the first five or six years of life though. There is something great about settling down in the chair with a youngster on one arm and a book on the other for the bedtime story. It even makes up for reading the same story until your ears bleed every time you hear the second sentence. And baths and the games therein just can’t be beat at that age. On the other hand, poop containment system failure is no fun what so ever.

I don’t know that anyone around here got into big trouble this week so it is hard to do #3 real justice. No one was caught doing things they shouldn’t be doing, no one was calling me on the phone and screaming, and I don’t think I can claim the weather got in trouble. I do have a friend who had to change pain medications as he waits for the FDA to approve the surgery he needs. Until then, he is on very high doses of pain killers and it finally reached the point last week that they were concerned about permanent liver damage and so moved him onto morphine. We (him, his wife, L, and I) were supposed to go out to eat last weekend, but due to the trials of adjusting to the morphine, he lost the weekend. (Literally – he doesn’t remember much of it at all.) So I guess you could say he got into big trouble. He seems to be returning to normal now as they get the dosages and timing adjusted.

No poems this week, so #4 is out. Poetry and the finer emotions just don’t seem to be on the tip of my tongue this tonight.

As for the trip, that one is easy. My nephew is getting married in Seattle this summer and the Son is in the wedding party. That is where I’d be travelling if I could. Instead, I’ll be in the mountains of Colorado playing corporate “wifey” for L at the annual meeting of her company. It is one of those “not mandatory” but really mandatory appearances for spouses. It figures that the two events are the same weekend in June. At least I have had the pleasure of meeting my nephew’s bride to be. They were out this way to visit Mom and me some months ago. You know how you see some couples and its clear that they just fit well with each other? That is my nephew and his fiancee. I think they make a great couple and wish them well.

Time to get some stuff prepared for tomorrow. The District 1 CML (Colorado Municipal League) meeting is here and we are hosting, so I figure i should at least be a bit clueful about what is going on. Not only that, but it will be one of only two appearances by yours truly as District 1 President. You can read about how I got railroaded into that job here.

county bob, mail order, medicine, rant, rave, weather

Land of the Mini Rants and a Rave

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Today was a day of minor irritations. Most of them weren’t enough to be rant worthy on their own, but there were several that made it to the level of deserving a good mini-rant. After all, one of the crossword puzzles I did last week had “blogger’s self-indulgent prerogative”as a clue with the answer “rant”. Since I am always for self indulgency, here is my collection of mini-rants for the day. Plus, to end on a positive note, a rave is included at the end.

Mini rant #1: Weather. The air pressure fell to extreme lows today, meaning that I hurt. Remember a week ago Monday when I showed the high pressure on my goose neck barometer:

 

Notice that the fluid in the neck has been forced all the way back to the body of the barometer by the high air pressure. That means I felt pretty good. Now contrast that to the same barometer this evening:

Notice how the low air pressure has the fluid streaming out of the neck. That means I ache all over.

Mini rant #2: Medical tests and getting older. With every year older I get, the more and more “recommended” tests and tweaks happen during my annual exam. When turned fifty, it was time for the initial colonoscopy. This year I turned 55 and with that milestone came the addition of the infamous “manual rectal prostate exam” to the standard PSA blood test. I can hardly wait to turn 60 and see what else gets added. {*grin/2*} It didn’t help any that the phlebotimist had trouble drawing the three vials of blood for all the blood tests and so had to poke and jab multiple times to get enough blood.

Mini rant #3: Mail order fulfilment oddities. When you are my size and wear size 16 shoes, you seldom get to walk into a store and shop. Same goes for clothing. So you have to order from the few places that specialize in big and tall sizes. Last week I went online and ordered a pair of shoes and some other items. I specifically chose a pair of shoes that were shown to be in stock because I needed them *now*. Today the order arrived with everthing in it *except* the shoes. Instead there was a note saying that they were on backorder and would possibly ship later. Not only did the company lie about having the shoes in stock via their online order system which *should* have been tied directly to their inventory, but they are not even sure they will be able to get them to me at any time in the near future.

Rave of the Day: Kudos to Country Bob’s BBQ Sauce. Today they sent me a very nice BBQ cookbook and coupons for Country Bob’s at a local store so I could gift friends and family who haven’t yet tried County Bob’s with a bottle. What an inspired word of mouth campaign!  I think this is a great idea. Not only do they have a great product, but they really understand grass roots marketing. Go Country Bob’s!

Time to figure out what I am going to talk about on the radio in the morning. Maybe I’ll feature the radio show nude tap dancing team. {*grin*}

foster parents, garden, planting, weather

Stiff and Other Things

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Yesterday was the annual Foster Parent appreciation event. May is the month of the Foster Parent, which I duly proclaim every year. The social services department and case workers and child professionals host an afternoon event to honor the foster parents. We eat way too many calories, drink coffee and punch, and then play bingo for donated prizes. I have attended this event every year since I became mayor. This was my last such event since I am term limited out of office in November. L was in town and able to attend with me, so we had a good time and got to say goodbye and thank you to the parents and staff.

I always find it a bit sad that social services is a county department, but it is a too rare occurrence when any of the commissioners attend and say thank you to the foster parents. Foster parents have a tough (and heart wrenching) job in todays society. Many of the far western states like California have moved to an orphanage type system (under more PC names, but if it quacks like a duck, it’s a good time to get out the shotgun!) due to the scarcity of qualified foster parents. It will be interesting to see what the system looks like in another 20 years everywhere.

Today started off dull and dreary with bouts of wind and a few rain sprinkles. Not an auspicious beginning to getting the onions planted in Mom’s garden. We had originally planned on planting Friday and then Saturday, but it was too cold and windy and rainy both days. But the weather cleared by 11am this morning and it warmed up a bit, so I spent the majority of the afternoon planting onions. For those who haven’t planted onions, it involves spending a lot of time contorted into positions that would make a Sumo wrestler proud. By the end of the day, my thighs were giving out, so i sat on the ground outside the planting area and scooted along to plant the last couple of rows. Then it was time to hook the drip irrigation system up and finish applying the weed killer and fertilizer.

That led to getting mom out to the back yard to supervise my efforts. I think she was a bit surprised at her ability to manuever the wheel chair on the lawn once we got her out there. Whereas I was tired and stiff and happy to be done, Mom was sitting there and with raw hunger in her eyes, wanting to get out into the soft soil in the garden area. If her hip heals up and the bones that were operated on in her ankle continue to mend, she might soon be out there. If not, she might be a bit cranky. {*grin*}

Time to get some things done I have my annual diabetic exam in the morning and need to get some stuff ready. Don’t do anything i wouldn’t!

games, spoofs

You’re So ….

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I overheard a couple of youngsters berating each other the other day, obviously playing the ancient game of “You’re so ugly!”. Rumor has it that the original rules of the game were engraved on the walls of a burial chamber in the oldest of the pyramids. Some believe the Ptolemy was the figure of power behind the game salvos between the Greeks and Romans that led to some of the more famous battles of classical times. In more modern times, a friendly game between Lenin and Stalin escalated into some of the more acrimonious assassination attempts of the 20th Century. Much of modern history can be explained as as games of “You’re so ugly!” gone awry.

Given the popularity of the game and the power in its invocation, I herewith give you a short list of personal favorites. It should be enough to prime your mental pump to come up with more.

You’re so ugly … that the weather satellites refuse to photograph your neighborhood.


You’re so ugly … that your mother glued postage stamps over your face in the family pictures.


You’re so ugly … that the Gorgon was turned to stone when she espied your mug.


You’re so ugly … that your spouse wears sunglasses to bed at night – and refuses to allow night lights in the bedroom.

You’re so ugly … that the gargoyles on the civic center voted to take up a plastic surgery collection for you.


You’re so ugly … when you walk into the bank they turn off the cameras.


You’re so ugly … when you were born they put tinted windows on your incubator.


You’re so ugly … when you were born the doctor took one look at you and slapped your parents.


You’re so ugly … you have to Trick or Treat by telephone.


You’re so ugly … people put your picture in their car window as an anti-theft device.


You’re so ugly … they call you Moses because every time you step in the lake, the water parts.

You’re so ugly … you make blind kids cry.

Now it’s your turn. Leave your favorites in the comments!

barometer, weather

Monday Quickie

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(Get your mind out of the gutter! I’m talking about a short post here.)

Today was odd here. I woke up to snow falling and even a bit accumulating on the ground. Quite a change from the upper 80s of a couple of days of ago. I just wish the weather would settle down to normal here, but I’m not holding out a lot of hope.

L was in town for some meetings and to take care of some business, so we had an early supper of soup and salad before she left for the mountains this evening. Along the way to the mountains, she was going to meet the Son in Denver to pass on some papers he needed and also some workout clothes he requested. Given that he will be back in the mountains for work tomorrow, it probably won’t be a major deal if the miss each other – except that they both like to talk and it does them both good. {*grin*}

The barometric pressure here has been rising and falling severely here for the last week. As a consequence, my shoulders have hurt constantly, especially the one I crushed a few years ago. I have a swan neck barometer here in my office:

 

This year is the first year it has encountered highs and lows severe enough to alternately spout out the top of the neck and suck air down through the bottom. It has been hanging there for years, but the weather here is definitely getting more changeable. Yesterday the air pressure was so low that the swan neck  was spouting out the top. Now it is so high that the swan is sucking air and bubbling. I vote for a return to some moderation.

Well, I’ve got some stuff to get done yet tonight, so until tomorrow ….